Do The Spider-Monkey

I reserve full and sole rights to one day create a dance called the Spider-Monkey. This will either be when a) disco gets reincarnated *snort* or b) straight white men are allowed to dance in public again. Anyway, it's definitely going to be something with wobbly arms, but I haven't figured out the details yet...

Why? Why on earth would I want to do this? Because. That's it. Just because. Just because classes have ended, the day was beautiful and I had an awesome day despite a late night of work.

The count down to the exam has officially started. My schedule is comparatively tame; I don't write first, I don't write last, I don’t write much. The only complaint to be had is that my papers aren't exactly spaced nicely. But, you can't have everything. Only a couple more weeks...

It's high time I write about something other than university. It's kind of hard, because I have been completely absorbed by it. I can’t say, do or think anything without university causing ripple through it. But this is what I have chosen to do for a few years and I have to live it out to the end. Anyway, here goes...

So, things have been... busy the last few months; I had stuff to do (how does that one work?). As a result my general correspondence has taken a bit of a dive. It's not just from my side, though. This had sparked some internal debate: what relationships are worth the trouble, should staying in touch necessarily be so much work yada yada yada. I did commit more to the... stuff... this year and sometimes a person has to be able to bare the grunt of the work for a while, especially if you know things are probably just as hectic with the other person. There was one thing that upset me a great deal, however. One of my friends, whom I hadn’t seen since school, returned to visit her home after living in the UK for almost two years. Despite the fact that we had plans to get together for a coffee or something, it never happened. I didn’t even know she was back in the country until she almost left again. I know and acknowledge that I don’t rank near the top of her list of best friends, but this just... sucked. I’ve tried to reason it away a bit but... nah, you know what, I have to sort this thing out with her first. It’s not something I’m particularly looking forward to, but it has to be done. It should have been done a while ago. Bleh.

Other than that my personal life has been good save for a few hiccups here and there. Things have been rather quiet, especially since I have moved back. I miss the convenience and quasi-independence I had when I lived in the Bos. I’m going to look for a new place to stay there for next year, but I won’t wager a bunch of money that I’ll find something. There’s always hope though.

I very recently came to the realization that I have entered the phase of my life where there are less right-wrong decisions and more decisions which merely determine your personality. I don’t like this, but it’s a part of the new life. I like it when things are clear-cut right or wrong or good or bad. Even though I believe that, fundamentally, solutions boil down to one of these sets of outcomes, it’s hard to see it most of the times. Although this revelation does not help me with the current choices I have to make, maybe it will bring me perspectives on other people’s decisions and help me to be more understanding of other people’s actions.

I currently have no concrete plans for my holiday. I put off day-dreaming about the holiday so I could focus on the stuff. It’s probably going to involve a bit of travel inland, but I want to spend more time at the beach this holiday. It’s a shame; I live so close to the coast but never go to the beach... I’d like to take the day-by-day approach to planning my holiday, but in my experience that causes a lot of time to be wasted. Meh, we’ll see; I still have some stuff to do.

21st! It’s in a little more than a couple of months. I have a few vague ideas, but again I haven’t put much though into it. It would seem that a lot of my holiday is going into planning. I just hope it isn’t too late to reserve a place or something – my bday is at a slightly awkward time for short to mid-term planning. But, again, we’ll see. I’ve had enough worries of late to let this thing bother me at the moment.

Anyway, there’s more, but I’m tired of typing now, so I’m throwing in the towel. Goodnight and enjoy your weekend!

My Fall (Part II)

Like any good horror flick, there's a sequel! Just when you think you can't actually go any lower, you hit the ground, go up, and come down again very hard. Like a freaking little bouncy ball.

On Friday I wrote my computer science practical exam and for the very first time ever, I screwed up big time. It felt like a little something died inside of me; this had always been my forte, the one place where I could shine! Oh well, chin up, move on.

Amazingly enough, we got our marks back today (I wasn't the only one who didn't do too well, so I'm guessing the grading was a breeze) and, even more amazingly enough, I scored 25%! But only because he decided to grade differently than he originally wanted to (I might get a bit more actually, we’ll see). This makes me feel kind of dirty... but what can you do? Luckily I [think I] don't need anything from the practical exam because I did well enough everywhere else. If I had to rely on this, I would have been completely and utterly shattered.

Another saving grace is that I don't care any more. Practically no-one does. Last week sometime, the will to work left most of my fellow students and myself. Really should be doing work now for something important tomorrow or later in the week, but I can't bring myself to. We are all now drifting aimlessly and listlessly through lectures and tuts, just waiting for the exam to begin, because after the exam, we have holidays baby! W00t!

Congrats to The Freeman who had his birthday yesterday! Thanks for everything and I hope you have a clear and straight road ahead of you!

4 days of classes left, 2 weeks until first exam paper, 3 weeks until final exam paper and summer holiday.

Quote of the day (actually from Saturday): "He is a vegetarian, especially when his girlfriend is around."

My Fall

Things are still going crazy. I really hate this, because I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but it's the truth. This week I have hit a new low: I have failed to complete a Computer Science project.

We had to create a PostgreSQL database that contained information regarding student accommodation in Stellenbosch. We then had to write a Java interface for users and agents to browse/update the database. I had these excellent ideas I wanted to implement, but I ran out of time. Well, I actually have a host of excuses. First and foremost, I have developed a really, really, really, really, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY... strong disliking (to say the least) for Swing. To make things even more interesting, I decided to go hardcore and do everything manually; no NetBeans, no auto-complete, just typing. Ugh, thanks to my previous lecturer for this idiotic ethos! I also decided to take on the project alone as opposed to working with someone else. I don't really have experience programming with someone else on a big project, but the past has show that I can get frustrated waiting for others. I also had a few personal problems this week that completely took it out of me. And of course, I had other things to do as well; I'm not one to neglect everything for a single module. Lastly, I just got really tired and gave up. Apparently last year's project was much shorter and the people did it in like a week. Guess my "generation" can't always have it easier, but I still feel slightly cheated because of that.

PostgreSQL was fun, but now I have to re-orientate myself for MySQL. Well, when I gain the will and time again to work on this site... JDBC was actually okay to work with. The whole DB experience this module brought has been interesting for me, though some of the theory can get a person down.

The idea of layout managers is like communism: it seems okay on paper, but in practise, it doesn't cut it. Give me absolute positioning!! Ugh, you have no idea how I longed to use Delphi again...

I'm hoping my program will have basic functionality by tomorrow. I don't care any more, I just want to pass. Plus I have a test on Monday I have to be studying for. Goody gumdrops.

Now that I have completely geeked out, I can hopefully also lay this to rest. This project took more than its pound of flesh from me.

Perspectives

So the past few days have been really bad for me and I have been feeling really sorry for myself because of the tests, projects, assignments and other goodies have been buried beneath. I'm thinking I have it really bad and would appreciate a little sympathy, you know? I mean, its time I get a pat on the back or something...

Today my mother told me that one of the women who work with her, has died. She woke up with a headache and her husband took her to work. There, the headache only worsened, so he took her to the hospital. They did some tests, but she went into a coma. Shortly before my mother returned home, they received the tiding that she had died. An aneurism or something. She was only in her 30's and had two kids; one still only in grade one. I can't ever have imagined being dropped off at school by my mom and dad, and in the afternoon, only my dad arrives with a stricken face to tell me that my mother isn't here any more.

So I have problems? Sure. Do I have any right to bitch and complain about it like I do? No. I know it's evil, but I usually find comfort or reassurance that someone is worse off than me (did worse in a test or assignment), but this thing has completely taken me aback. I pray that these people will have comfort and support, and that after they have grieved, they can remember fondly of their mother and wife. Its not right...